The Yikes! Moment

Oprah is big on the Aha Moment. It's that point of revelation when something profound is suddenly clear to you. Every month in her magazine she features some well-known person revealing one of their personal Aha Moments. I'm generally pretty appreciative of Oprah's self-assigned role to make sure America is at least somewhat cognizant of the value of reflective thought now and again. Because God-knows, nobody else is addressing it. BUT... these Aha Moments... it's mostly stuff you should have already known.

"I can't do everything. AHA!"

"Not everybody wants my help. AHA!"

"It's ok to say no. AHA!"

And so on.

Now... I think what's really a lot more instructive, is what I like to call a Yikes! Moment. I think they are a lot more practical. As you witness the fallout and conflagration, you say to yourself... "I must make sure this never-ever happens to me." And sometimes you add... "again."

In the early days of e-mail I was witness to a major calamity. The admin. in our department responded to an outrageously bossy e-mail from the president's much-disliked, but greatly-feared admin. with a "can you believe the nerve – I'm so fed up – no wonder we all hate her – " missive. She meant to FORWARD her complaint. But she hit REPLY.

She came racing into my cubicle with her hair on fire, "I'm toast! I'm toast!"

I said, "Oh, surely it's not that bad." She showed me. "YIKES! You are toast."

I advised her to put on her big girl pants and high-tail it right straight over to her nemesis' cubicle and apologize like she's never apologized before, throw herself on her nemesis' feet and beg for mercy. She did and it worked. In fact it worked a little too well – they bonded during their teary encounter. Having our dept. admin. become a close tight buddy with She-Devil was not exactly to my advantage, but oh well.

It was a very instructive Yikes! Moment for me. I always thought of e-mail as a loaded gun after that. And those buttons... any sensible person can see – they are triggers. I never want to self-immolate via e-mail because I don't think I'm physically capable of making that kind of apology. I would simply have to resign myself to being toast.

Hey, wait! Maybe that's my Aha Moment. Being able to deliver a good apology is valuable life skill. AHA!